Sunday, February 28, 2010

Purported Cheese Wafers

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees.

Guesstimate a half pound of cheddar cheese.

Measure 1 cup of flour and 5 tablespoons of butter.

Stick it in your food processor.

Remember you don't have a food processor.

Decide to use your Magic Bullet instead.

Realize your Magic Bullet has decided to lose it's Magic.

Triple check the previous fact in various outlets around the house.

(Remember to include the outlet in the bathroom directly above the toilet.)

Decide that it's probably okay just to mix it with your hands.

Realize that mixing it with your hands really requires the cheese not to be in one big block.

Decide that it will probably work if you just heat it up in the microwave.

Congratulate yourself that the ingredients now resemble a dough-like substance.

Convince yourself that it really is

Refrigerate one hour.

Remove from fridge and roll into 1/4 inch thick circle.

Stare in puzzlement as your dough(like) refuses to behave in a dough(like) manner.

Decide that it will probably work if you just heat it up in the microwave.

Elect to make a 1/2 inch thick circle instead.

Remember you have no small cookie cutters.

Commandeer the plastic shapes from the shape sorter.

Discover that by blowing in one side of the new cutter, the shaped dough(like) shoots out the other.

Bake in oven for 12 - 15 minutes.

Congratulate yourself that cheese wafers look normalish.

Congratulate yourself that cheese wafers taste normalish.

Try not to cry when your Goldfish-loving, cracker-loving son nibbles a corner, then throws the cracker on the floor and stomps on it.

Try not to sob when the cat sniffs the crushed cracker, screeches, and runs away.

Try not to remember that your mother-in-law is watching...

...and laughing...

and taking pictures.


P.S. Would someone with a food processor please give these a try and let me know how they turn out? Cheese Wafers


Bridget said...

I for one am WAY impressed with your cheese wafers and I guarantee you, I would love them! :)

Mama Papaya said...

And I say this with love. He is crazy. If I didn't feel really obligated to document my children's opinion of them, I am pretty sure I would have just eaten the entire pan.

Anonymous said...

I'm proud of you for trying them, cuz i LOVE anything cheese!! But really, follow directions.

Step #25: Fix magic bullet:)


Chatter said...

Oh Christina, good for you for trying! My cooking skills suck so you have lots of sympathy from me. Great pictures :)